This is a really hard post to make for me. Not in the sense of the previous thinker questions, but just in reflecting on someone I miss. Memory from words a loved one can no longer speak is a hard topic for me to think about, but what’s easy sometimes isn’t worth doing
30 Days of Blogging Day 20
My Grandma, Nana, had been declining in health and knowing this started sending things with us as we visited her. The thing that took me the longest time to open and look at after her passing was her Bible. With a hand embroidered cover, glued on a soft cover book, to anyone else it wouldn’t be special. To me, it was the most special.
I remember when I was growing up and my grandpa, Papa, would have different magazines and books and he would underline as he read the important things. As time went on, more and more became underlined – more and more became important. After my Papa passed, she used to say that you may feel lonely, but you’re never alone.
After Nana passed, I had the love and support of my family, but they were hurting like me. I remember thinking the person that I wanted to talk to – to tell me it would be okay, things would look up, we would get through it and move on – was the person that I couldn’t talk to anymore.
I remember working myself up to open the pages and see that she’d started underlining and making notes, just like Papa had. Turning pages bookmarked with her friend’s obituary listings and funeral notices, there was one page that was turned to often, and held in place by 7/8 of a yellowed sheet of paper with a hand written reminder.
This was probably the best thing I could have read, and why I now have a new appreciation for the passage, because it meant something to her. In the times she was hurting, or feeling alone, she always knew she was not alone.